Tuesday, November 22, 2016

FYI: Saying I don't look pregnant is not a compliment



All throughout my first pregnancy, people repeatedly told me that I didn't look pregnant. The first few times, it was fine and I thought nothing of it. But it kept happening - even in my third trimester! And no one understood why I wasn't flattered by those statements.

I kept hearing it from my boss, which made me feel like she didn't believe that I actually was pregnant. And when I was about 35 weeks, I volunteered to do a maternity shoot with a budding photographer to help boost their portfolio - and they wanted someone close to their due date. Well, when I showed up, they couldn't hide their disappointment that my belly wasn't massive (but to me, I felt like a whale!)

Well, I thought with my second pregnancy, I'd "look pregnant" much earlier - and to me, I did. I never got rid of my little tummy pooch and grew very early in my pregnancy. However, I still keep hearing "you don't even look pregnant!" And when I try to politely say something to hint to them that I want to look pregnant, or that I don't find that to be a complimentary statement, they go on and ON about why it's a good thing that I don't look pregnant. HA! (One of peoples' favorite reasons is that I can wear regular clothes still. Um... no. Actually, I had to start wearing maternity pants in my first trimester).

I don't know why I don't "look pregnant" to some people. I'm not wearing super tight tops and prefer looser shirts, and maxi skirts, and leggings - it's just so much more comfortable than my maternity jeans. But I think I look pregnant, and I see nothing wrong with that.

Repeatedly hearing that I don't look pregnant has me questioning... is there something wrong with looking pregnant? Are you insinuating that it's better to look flat-tummied than to have a glowing baby belly? I know it's undesirable to look pregnant when you aren't actually pregnant... but what's wrong with looking pregnant when you actually DO have a baby growing inside you?

I love my belly, and I love seeing it grow, because that means that my baby girl is growing too. Sure, there are things I don't like about my belly - like the lovely growth of dark hair that has sprouted in a line below my belly button. And of course there are things I don't like about pregnancy. The heartburn and back pain being the main things. But I love being pregnant.

And I love the way I look. 

True, I may gripe at times to my husband about looking larger or not feeling attractive, but who doesn't? Yet, overall, I am happy in my body. Pre-pregnancy and during pregnancy. And I will aim to love my post-pregnancy body too!


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