Human Milking and Making Milkshakes: Breast Pumps

So I had my first request for a post... breast pumps! Breast pumps can be very confusing (as are a lot of things you may need for a new baby I have learned!)
So here is my attempt to concentrate the smorgasbord of information out there on breast pumps... from what they are, to whether you may need one, to the different types available, to safety information, to the best selling pumps on the market today...

What is a breast pump?
Simply, a breast pump is a FDA regulated medical device used to extract breast milk from a nursing mother. They can also be used to "maintain or increase a woman’s milk supply, relieve engorged breasts and plugged milk ducts, or pull out flat or inverted nipples so a nursing baby can latch-on to its mother’s breast more easily." (FDA)

Do I need a breast pump?
Whether you are a working mom or a stay-at-home mom, you may find you have a need for a breast pump.